Clubbing.

What do you think of when you hear the word "clubbing"? I automatically think of baby seals being bludgeoned to death with spiky clubs and slowly dying in the blood soaked snow, but most people think about dance clubs. In theory they seem like a fantastic idea for anyone that enjoys partying, but I just can't seem to grasp what's so appealing about them. I mean, you go and listen to shitty music played so loud that you can't understand it, or the people around you while rubbing up against hot sweaty people who will most likely accidentally spill their overpriced alcohol on you as a result of their inebriation. The lights are bright and seem to be aimed directly at your eyes no matter where you are in the room, and if the loud "dance" music doesn't give you a headache, the super strobe is guaranteed to do just that. You can't talk to anyone because it's so loud, but if you do manage to talk to someone that you're interested in you're going to get shot down more often than not because girls go to the club to dance and be slutty, while guys go to get drunk and bone sluts. Sure, there are some success stories, and some people even have it all figured out well enough that they can have a good time and get what they want out of their evening, but paying five times what a beverage is worth is guaranteed to be a bummer, and the kinds of people that attend clubs are incapable of holding a conversation without a good buzz. I guess it's kind of nice to be surrounded by women that are dressed like sluts, but when you take into consideration that they're being hit on by dozens of men in an evening it kind of makes it seem pointless to even pursue any potential relationships. I guess what I'm saying is that I would far prefer to attend a barbeque, bonfire, or pool party with a few dozen people rather than waiting in line for hours to wade through a pile of sweaty sluts and douche bags to get to a bar and buy alcohol that I don't even need. I'm capable of holding a conversation without the use of drugs or alcohol and I wouldn't want to waste my time on anyone that couldn't do the same.
TLDR: I'd rather get clubbed than go clubbing.